Challenging Behaviours: Biting
Why do children bite?
Young children sometimes bite because they’re trying to cope with something. They might feel overwhelmed or not know how to express their needs. Understanding why they bite can help you figure out what to do.
Here are some common reasons children bite:
- They don’t have the words to say how they feel—like when they’re angry, excited, or frustrated.
- They feel overwhelmed by noise, lights, or too much going on.
- They’re curious and want to see what happens.
- They’re very tired.
- They’re teething and their gums hurt.
Biting back or using harsh punishments isn’t helpful. There’s no evidence that it works, and it can teach your child that biting is okay when they’re upset.
Think about what was happening right before your child bit someone. Ask yourself:
- What time of day was it?
- Who was around?
- What was your child doing?
- What were others doing?
- Was your child tired?
- Who was watching your child?
This can help you spot patterns and prevent biting in the future.
If you see your child about to bite, try:
- Distracting them with a toy or new activity.
- Helping them use words: “Lexi, tell Nick you don’t like it when he touches your face.”
- Teaching turn-taking with a timer: when it rings, it’s someone else’s turn.
- Reading books about biting together.
- Take a deep breath and stay calm—it’s hard, but it helps.
- Firmly say, “No biting. Biting hurts.”
- Focus on the child who was bitten. Show care and concern. This teaches your child that hurting others doesn’t get them more attention.
- Later, talk to your child about what happened and what they can do next time.
- Help both children move on to a new activity.
Remember: learning new behaviour takes time. If something doesn’t work, try a different approach. Talk to other parents, learn more about child development, or reach out to professionals for support.